Do we want a raging bull?

Peter Wu

22 August 2011

My friend Charles said, "I telephone Mayor Bloomberg just now, telling him that he has to extend an invitation to the girls, Helena, Stella, Danny, Virginia – for them to come to Wall Street and grope the Bronze Bull again. It has been 3 years they did not touch the private part of the bull and that may explain why the stock market is sagging.

It was their magic touch of the bull in 2008, the stock market performed very well in the last three years. Go back to your archived e-mails, I predicted that the bull will have a wild run with ladies' touch".

I am curious with Charles's suggestion of getting our lady school friends to grope a certain body part of the bull. With worries about the financial health of the US and the Sovereign indebtedness of countries in the Eurozone, I thought that a stimulus, like EQ3 or QE3 (sorry don’t understand which is which) may be the correct measure to take. So I am dumbfounded to hear your ‘arouse the bull’ proposal – clearly a much stronger measure to stimulate the market no doubt.

My questions are:

a. Why and how does arousing the bull by the ladies help the sagging stock market? My years of living in Kiwiland tell me an aroused, highly-excited bull is a dangerous beast so why would we want to do that? We don’t want to be screwed, do we?

b. What bull? Is this the real bull or a phony one (as the bull in bull-shit)?

c. If you want to arouse the bull, where do you find it? I know India has lots of cows (and may be some bulls) everywhere on the streets. But bulls in Wall Street? That’s news to me. Have they set them loose in Central Park?

Look buddy, I am a simpleton and have a natural aversion to arithmetic, math, credit, vehicles for asset protection and all those high-flighty financial stuff. I am a bank office-boy who toils at a bank (ta making, toilet cleaning, running errands etc) and that’s a million miles difference to a banker or people with legal expertise who everyone looks up to.

I am grateful for yours or somebody’s enlightenment to the questions above please.

I routinely rely on the Salvation Army Soup Kitchen for my daily sustenance, and the 20-cent hair cuts at the local Buddhist Charity Centre to help me keep body and soul together.