Jokes : A GOOD Alternative

Investment and Rental Agreement

資料提供者：KT Lai

2013年10月29日

A GOOD Alternative Investment

It's a real story but it's great for a good laugh!!

A Singapore millionaire, secretly maintained a mistress in Hong Kong , bought a posh sea view apartment (in his own name) for her to live in, plus gave her a monthly allowance of US$5,000. The house cost him about US$700,000 in 2005. The affairs lasted for 5 years.

He sold the house this year for $3.8 million, after they broke up.

A quick calculation shows that after 5 years of a fling with the woman, he still had a net gain of $2.8 million plus six years of FREE SEX. When his wife found out about this, he offers the $2.8 million to her.

But she was still not happy ........... , and she was very mad at him and gave him a big mouthful...

She yelled at him at the top of her voice and said ......"BLOODY IDIOT, STUPID FOOL" !!! .....

Why the hell didn't you keep TWO MISTRESSES !!!! _,_._,___

Rental Agreement

A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for $500.

They did their thing, and, before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a cheque and mail it to her, calling the payment

'RENT FOR APARTMENT.'

On the way to the office, he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event had not been worth the price. So he had his secretary send a cheque for $250 and enclose the following typed note:

'Dear Madam:

Enclosed find a cheque for $250 for rent of your apartment.

I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the place, I was under the impression that:

#1 - it had never been occupied;

#2 - there was plenty of heat; and

#3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home.

However, I found out that:

#1 - it had been previously occupied,

#2 - there wasn't any heat, and

#3 - it was entirely too large.'

Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the cheque for $250 with the following note:

'Dear Sir:

1. I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely.

2. As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on.

3. Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture

To fill it, please do not blame the management.

So, Please send the rent in full or we will be forced To contact your present landlady...