Problems Found in a Men’s Public Toilet in Singapore

(and we think of Singaporeans as dull, unimaginative, uncreative??)

The first one goes:

The 'Future' is in your hand, hold it gently'

你的將來全操在你手里, 請輕握.

Another one...

Here I lie in stinky vapor,

Because some bastard stole the toilet paper,

Shall I lie, or shall I linger,

Or shall I be forced to use my finger.

一進來臭氣沖天, 皆因某君把紙用光, 我該怎辦(用手?)

This one by a budding poet...

Here I sit..

Broken hearted

Tried to shit..

But only farted

坐了很久結果只放了屁.

Then the next guy comes along....

You're lucky

You had your chance

I tried to fart,

And shit my pants!

你較幸運我想放屁結果拉滿褲

Third guy with some inspiration.....

I came here

To shit and stink,

But all I do

Is sit and think.

The 4th guy....

Some come here to sit and think,

Some come here to shit and stink,

But I come

here to scratch my balls ,

And read the bullshit on the walls.....

Then this guy from Singapore Fire Dept. ....... (written high upon the wall)

If you can piss above this line, the Singapore Fire Department wants you.

新加坡消防隊寫 : 如果你能射高越此線, 消防局需要你

Since the Ministry of Environment owns the toilets they have something to say too.....

We aim to please!

You aim too! Please

我們描準為了討好下一個,因此請你們也如是.

and on the inside of a toilet door:

Patrons are requested to remain seated throughout the entire performance.

來賓在表演過程中請坐好

And finally a restaurant owner took this aiming issue a step further.....

The hands that clean these toilets also make your food...please aim properly.

餐廳老闆:洗廁所的人也是負責端您的菜,因此請描準一點